the HOW did not matter : 2012 wave #26

{catch the other posts at Riding The 2012 Wave}

In my prior post #25,
I was feeling quite helpless and trapped.

After letting Roy leave my heart,
I felt stronger,
more confident.

I began my quest of getting out of that relationship.
I did not know how I was to do that,
I just knew I would! The HOW did not matter.
(stay, you love Roy, ego urges)

One day soon after releasing Roy from my heart,
I went to get my mail.
Timing was such (synchronicity),
that Dean, the mailman, was delivering mail.

Our friendship was fairly new,
yet we felt comfortable with each other.

He asked how I was doing.

I told him I was great and was getting ready to move.

He was shocked and asked, “Where to?”

My reply,
“I have no idea!
I just know I am moving!
I am done with this relationship
and must move on.”
(that’s right, talk stupid talk, interrupted ego)

Then his next words
took me by total surprise,
“Move in with me!”

“Say what? Are you serious?
We don’t even know each other!”
(don’t listen to him! ego spatted)

Dean went on to say,

“We do not know each other,
but I like you  and we do have a friendship.
You can trust me.
I live alone.
You and your boys can have the basement.
I enjoy being able to help others
and it would be wonderful to have children in my home.
Think about it.
Rent free till you find a job and get back on your feet.”
(beware! he is up to no good, ego insisted)

photo by ren – Dean and Babe enjoying the moment

“Thank you. I will give it some thought,”
as I took my mail and went back to the apartment.
What just happened? I asked myself…..
(you can’t trust him, ego told me)

I did give it some thought,
as I searched my other options
of being homeless with 2 young kids.
I had no job,
so I was faced with shelters and possibly losing my children.
The more I thought on it,
the more inviting Dean’s offer became.
(dean is crazy, do not live with him, ego added)

In short time,
I took him up on his offer
and my kids and I, moved in with Dean.
(biggest mistake you ever made, ego assured)

To be continued,


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